May 27,2020

I dreamed of an alligator again except this time it was really big and all white. It was passive and just turned away from me.  I haven’t been working on any of my goals. I have been working and its really putting a toll on my body. I’m tired all the time. It’s the reason why I wanted out. I think my dream represents me and my disappointment in myself. I can’t even write every day; I’m dooming myself before I even start. I am going to keep trying I might surprise myself.

I ordered pizza tonight I hate going to the grocery store. The hub said order out and he didn’t have to twist my arm. I work tomorrow in the am a long day I will be hurting afterwards that’s for sure. This entry sounds like one of my phone calls so I’m going to go for now. I do intend on doing some different things on here like videos and pictures of my family this is my recording of my life from 5/2020 on so its time to step up my game.

                                                                                 Jessika Bland  7:10pm